Originally, I wrote this blog several years ago but I believe the Lord wants me to share the following today – being that it is a day to celebrate FATHERS.
God gave me a revelation several years back that I want to share with each of you. It may set some of you free; lifting a burden that may be weighing you down; making you believe you need to be someone you aren’t called to be for your children.
The morning my son turned 13 almost three years ago; I cried out to God on my knees because as a single mother I thought “how am I going to teach him to be a man? His dad doesn’t live nearby. God, I can’t teach him to be a man. I’m not a man; I’m not a father. God, I need YOU to be his Father”. God responded “I am his Father. I am a Father to the fatherless.”
That did not mean that my son didn’t have a father because he did and I’m thankful to God that my son has been blessed to have his dad be the male role model he needs now more than ever. My son is taught, corrected and most importantly, loved! I take no credit away from the one helping me raise my son nor do I try to fill his shoes. My son is blessed with an awesome earthly dad and the perfect Heavenly Father.
But the reality was that (at the time) they lived hours apart from one another so while my son was with me in my home, God Fathered him. Then I heard the Lord say “Proverbs”. For those of you who don’t know, the Book of Proverbs is a book of instruction which also shows us how to “train up a child; a son/daughter”.
See, God was giving me the tools to train him up in the ways of the Lord through His Word. In that very moment, an instant peace entered my heart because I knew that in that season of my life or even now; I was not going to walk through my son’s teenage years – alone. God was going to lead my house; guide me in teaching my son; He was going to help me raise my son through His Word and He reassured me that despite what I saw with my natural eyes that would contradict was His word says; I was to know and believe that I was raising my son with God; his heavenly Father before us. My job was to walk by faith and not by sight; declaring the word of the Lord over my son’s life always.
I say that to say this; we (single moms) are not fathers nor are we called to be. In fact, the Bible never says a woman should or could fill the role of a father. We are mothers. The reason we’re able to “be strong” and “do so well” and “persevere” is because there is a Heavenly Father that reminds us in His Word in the book of Proverbs 68:5 that He is the Father to the fatherless. It is He who gets the glory; the honor; the praise for strengthening the single mother as He does.
Each time we fall; He picks us back up; each time we cry; He captures our tears and places them in a bottle. He sees the single mother just as He saw Hagar (a single mother – also the servant of Sarah, Abraham’s wife) when she was kicked out of Abraham’s camp (this story can be found in the Book of Genesis).
She and her son were sent out with a skin of water and bread and when it ran out; she feared her son’s death. The Bible says in Genesis 21:16 “Then she went and sat down across from him at a distance of about a bowshot; for she said to herself, “Let me not see the death of the boy.” So she sat opposite him, and lifted her voice and wept”. A couple of verses later in Genesis 21:17-18 it says “And God heard the voice of the lad. Then the angel of God called to Hagar out of heaven, and said to her, “What ails you, Hagar? Fear not, for God has heard the voice of the lad where he is. Arise, lift up the lad and hold him with your hand, for I will make him a great nation.” She wasn’t alone. Her son wasn’t alone. The Lord God reassured Hagar that He was going to take care of her son, Ishmael.
Hear me out for a second. There is nothing wrong with commending the single mother for all she’s done to make her child’s life the best it can be in the absence of a father figure. But let’s remember her strength comes from the Lord. Day in. Day out. He sees us; the single mother. He is the One Who strengthens us to be all that we can be for our children.
Our job as a mom comes with a great deal of responsibility. Yes, we sacrifice a lot and that should never be discredited but let’s remember that the void of a father; can never be filled by a mother just as the void of mother can never be filled by a father. Yes, give honor to whom honor is due but never forget who you are and who God called you to be. Their MOM.
We are unique. Mothers are called to nurture and sometimes be more stern than others, we are called to teach the things that they need to know in order to be great in life. We are called to encourage; strengthen; uplift but we are not ever called to fill the void that only a father can fill.
So, I speak from experience because for many years I thought I had to be mom and dad and it was only when the Lord showed me I was NOT both, that I was set free. That’s why I share this message in love because it’s something God showed me and I believe He wants you to know today.
I encourage you to continue to be a MOM; be the best mom you can be and always remember, you’re not in this alone. HE (The Heavenly Father) is with you on this journey.
May you blessed in Jesus’ name!